So last night I had this dream. Let me paint the picture for you...

It was a Sunday morning in the high school side of 249. There were a LOT of people there - it was packed! I saw a lot of people, like, from my school. It was really dark (I'm pretty sure the walls were black instead of red) and there was music on and everyone was just dancing and having fun. So on stage are Trey, Katie, Riley, and I, and I'm sure we play a fun, upbeat song to start off with. But then all the sudden it's supposed to be just me. Trey, with his new beautiful guitar, steps back by Riley's drum cage and Katie just kind of stands there by her mic. I'm on the keyboard. The spot light is on me. Then, of course, everything that could go wrong went wrong. I started playing the chords (and I'm pretty sure I played the right chords, too - I was watching as I was playing and it looked correct, haha), but all the sudden I couldn't remember the words. So I mouthed to Katie "what are the words?" and she was like, "I only remember the words to the 2nd verse". And so I had to apologize and stop and rifle through the million chord charts in front of me. M&T wasn't there. So I just had to kind of make up something. And whenever I started to sing, my voice sounded TERRIBLE - like, my throat was all mucus-y and I was sick, and so it sounded very hoarse and gross. And then my mic stand kept messing up and doing that thing where the microphone doesn't stay in one spot and it droops down. So I think Amy came on stage and helped me. So I had to stop again and apologize. Then I was at the first chorus, and I kind of just stopped playing the piano and sang a capella. NO ONE was singing with me. It was just me, and everyone was just kind of staring at me. And then the second verse came, and I forgot the words of course again. So I looked over at Katie and she reminded me. So I start to sing and play (terribly), and all the sudden in the middle of the 2nd verse, I stopped, turned around, and threw up Taco Bell into the little box where monitors are plugged into. Trey just gave me "the look" and was like, finish the song! And so I apologized to everyone again and continued to play. And the rest of the song went as such. I mean, it took me like 10 minutes to get through the song because I kept stopping and kept forgetting words and such. It was an ABSOULTE disaster.

And then I had this random dream about going to the mall to buy new shoes. I went into this one store and there were just these two big boxes full of nasty old shoes that I had to dig through. I didn't find any that I wanted.

Thoughts?

One super-busy day down, two to go this week. Whew!

Got free pancakes at IHOP tonight. That was cool.

Band practice with daddy-o as our babysitter! hahaa. Fun fun fun.

My room is still clean. I LOVE it!!

"Doon't stop belieeeeeevin'..."

1. His Mercies are new every morning. I've experienced His gift of morning time increasingly this year... I thank the Lord for Late Arrival (and I don't just mean this in a flippant way!) because I've been able to start and faithfully continue a new habit this year of reading His Word and praying each morning. Though of course this is a habit that I should have started long ago (and is one that I recommend to everyone), having an extra hour than in previous years to get ready certainly helped this idea along.

2. I will never, EVER, stop being infinitely thankful for my amazing parents. They are the two best people I know. I am also eternally grateful to and thankful for Mama and Papa - I pray for you often, can't wait 'till April! - and Grandma and Grandpa, who all work so hard and give so much to their families. And my three siblings who bring SO much joy into my life...I really look forward to growing an "empire" throughout the years together! Who knows, maybe in 30 years we'll be going on another Roberts Family Celebration Cruise, this time with Grandpa Bill and Grandma Jill on their 50th Anniversary and all the kids and grandkids (and, of course, our four wonderful, healthy Great-Grandparents!).

3. Two words: Taco Bell. : )

4. Having a room to myself that I can feel comfortable and find rest in, no matter what.

5. Summertime. It's quickly approaching...!!!!

6. My wonderful new friends this year - though you guys don't read this thing : ), I want to especially thank Lauren Rice, Sarah Madden, Jenna Luecke, and Julie Smith for helping me, trusting me, and laughing with me thus far this year and letting me experience new, genuine friendships at Cy-Fair.

7. My established friends I've known for a long time whose friendship and trust I can always count on...Taylor, Ally, Bree, Zach, Riley, Kyle, Chino (to name a few!)...thank you guys for never making me feel like I have to please you or work hard to win your approval or "keep the friendship alive". It's just always there no matter the circumstance. It's really nice to have that kind of constancy.

8. My wonderful church, Houston Northwest Baptist Church. Last night at the Church Conference I was reminded why I love my church as much as I do!

9. That I don't have to know why. As a human with limited intelligence I can be content to just witness the wonder of His Creation.

10. Marie Evans, who sent me the most encouraging note EVER in the mail the other day! Not only do I love getting mail : ), I just so deeply appreciate her kind, sincere words. It blessed me so much, Marie!

This weekend me and the fam went to Austin for Blake's soccer tournament! They won, of course. To quote Trey Weise, "he's one cool cat". It was a nice relaxing weekend - got to see some family. It was great!

And now the week stands before me...I'm not going to lie, it's starting to freak me out! I have piano on Monday, work and band practice Tuesday, work and ABS Wednesday, PAL convention from 3-8 on Thursday, and work on Friday. Dun dun dunn... I mean, I really don't mind being busy as long as it's routine, but I'm just getting nervous because it doesn't leave much time to practice piano, which has been on my mind a LOT lately, as I have to memorize 4 songs, one of which is, like, 8 pages long. EEK! So please be praying for me in this area. I've definitely been making good progress lately, but not to my satisfaction. Oh, and Save the Date - my big Senior Recital is going to be Sunday afternoon, June 7! I've also wanted to have more time to devote to running. Me and daddy try to wake up early to run; I really do like waking up early...but it's hard! It requires for me to go to bed earlier, which is something I've really been trying to do. As for school, it's pretty easy right now. I don't actually do homework anymore, because I simply don't really have any. I have Calculus everyday but I can just get it done in class. Ah, being a Senior is nice... : )

And - keep me accountable to this! - I've come to a peace on the whole Prom issue. I was thinking about it on Friday and I pretty much had a major freakout, and I all the sudden realized, it's not that big of a deal. It's not going to make or break my year if I don't get asked/don't go. So I'm deciding to not worry about it. It's going to be a struggle...but I'll try not to force it, and see what comes of the situation.

My room is clean, by the way, which is basically a miracle! Let's see if it can stand strong through this major challenge, though... anytime I go on a trip and come home, my suitcase stays in my room with the clothes still in it for usually a month, at LEAST. Unpacking is the worst. So I'm making it a goal to clear it out tomorrow night. Wish me and my room luck...

I was just thinking today about how little time I have...not in a short-term sense, but in a long-term sense, if you follow. Just six or so months, and I'm gone...

I was eating cereal just a few moments ago, when I started to think about all the ways I eat food that get made fun of. And I then got the impules to make a list of some of those habits, or of things that I do that are sometimes paradoxical, or just random quirks. We'll see where this list ends up taking me...

1. I hum whenever I eat cereal. I so can't even help it. In fact, I don't even realize it. I'll just be eating cereal, and there will be a song in my head. There's something very rhythmic about eating cereal, I guess, that makes me probably want to sing along. I mean, whenever I eat cereal I get in this daze. I start daydreaming and such. But I'll just be sitting there eating cereal, and one of my family members will just start laughing at me. They usually say something along the lines of, "You enjoying your cereal?", because the humming usually comes out to sound like "Yum, um um um..." because my mouth opens and closes rhythmically. If that makes sense. All I know is that I've been doing it my whole life and I don't know how to stop!

2. I eat a "naked burrito", as Bree and Hudson called it. At Chipotle I free the burrito of it's foil and just eat it as is. I embrace when the contents of the burrito want to fall out. I really like the "droppings" of tacos - I like eating the remnants with a fork afterward. Call me crazy.

3. I also don't like drinking with straws. I think I get this from my mom. I didn't think that this was weird (and for all I know it could be totally normal), but, again, Bree and Hudson thought it was strange. They looked at me like I was an alien whenever I sat down at Chipotle one time with my lidless, strawless drink. It's just so much better when you can feel the ice!

4. At El Gallo I always eat exactly one fajita, then commence the cycle of usually several rounds of eating chicken, rice, cheese, queso, beans, etc. (basically a fajita without the tortilla) on my plate. Andrew always thought it was weird. He wondered why I didn't just keep eating it like a fajita. I don't know, I guess it just makes me feel like I'm eating less when it's on a plate.

5. I'm a selective germophobe. I will never drink after anyone, and if you ask me to drink out of my drink, I will do one of two things: a) I will let you and then throw it away when you are not looking (this is if I don't know you that well and don't want to offend you or decline your request), or b) I will say no, if I know you well. Of I guess if you know me well. In any case, I am really paranoid about people drinking after me and using my chapstick, etc. But then again I am rather flippant about other things considering germs - for example, sometimes at band practice I put my mouth around everyone else's mic to freak them out (I mean, it's not like my mouth really touches the microphone all that much anyway - I have a big mouth!). Of course, if I were to really think about how disgusting doing that actually is, I wouldn't do it. But I don't, so I'm down.

6. I really just don't like when people touch me. Usually only when it's done without my permission or when it feels obligatory. People mistake this as me just not appreciating what "touch" means - you know, as a love language or whatever - But, au contraire, I would argue that I actually value touch more than some others do. One of the major ways I see this is hugging. There are some people I know who hug everybody. It's like a ritual almost. You see them, and they hug you. It's like saying "hey, how are you?". It's so mechanical that it doesn't really mean anything. To me, hugging someone or touching them in any way says something. I mean, I love giving a hug to my close friends (it's not like I only hug them - it's just that I only feel comfortable when they are the ones I am hugging). It tells them that I love them and appreciate them. But do I love and deeply appreciate everyone in my life? I mean, yes, I love everyone of course, but you know what I mean. It's like when people talk about how much "I love you" gets thrown around. It's disgusting, because it totally devalues the phrase. That's how I feel about touch - not that I don't appreciate it, but that I appreciate it so much that I don't think that you should give it out to everyone all the time. You gotta be at least somewhat selective. That's what I think at least.

7. The parka/flip-flop complex. My feet being cold just doesn't bother me. And even if it does, it's a small sacrifice for not having to wear close-toed shoes. You have no idea how much I despise close-toed shoes. I mean, I love tennishoes in the right contexts, but close-toed shoes worn on an everyday basis. I seriously just hate them. None of them flatter my feet (don't fight me on this one - I'm not going to change my opinion, no matter how irrational it may be), and my feet feel so trapped when they are in close-toed shoes. So laugh at me if you want, but I am a year-round flip-flop/sandal wearer. Ankles up, I'm dressed for 20 below, and ankles down I'm dressed for summer. "That's just how I roll", to quote the Jonas Brothers.

8. I don't like iPods. Well, let me clarify - it's not to a point where I won't use them if necessary. I hate radio more than I hate iPods, so I use one in my car because there's no way to play CDs in it. But CDs are just so much better. I've never owned my own iPod - the one I have now is Andrew's old one he got like 3 Christmases ago, and it's so beat up and has the cruddiest battery life known to man that I have to charge it everyday. But whatev. I will fight this one to the death. CDs all the way.

9. I don't really like chocolate all that much - but I posted another post about this one, so I'll just leave it at that.

10. I don't really like peppermints and chocolate mixed, s.a. Andes Mints or Junior Mints, but I LOVE Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream. There's just something different about it.


I'll leave the list at that for now. I have an infinite amount of weird quirks, but 10 seems like a good number for the time being. If I think of more I'll add them later.

Have a good week!

I just watched A Walk to Remember (my favorite movie of all time) with my mom, and, of course, some MCC ice cream. I don't care what anyone says. This movie is one of the most beautiful movies ever created. It has never failed to touch me; I cry every time I watch it, without fail.

Dear Future Valentine,

Happy Valentine's Day! I can't wait to meet you :).

I pray for you often. I pray that you will wait for me like I am waiting for you; that you wouldn't chase frivolous relationships or become emotionally attached to anyone else. I pray that you would seek God's will for your life and not pursue worldly things.

I promise that I am waiting for you. I promise that on days like today I won't feel sorry for myself or feel jealous of others who have people to celebrate it with at this very moment. Instead, I will rejoice in what I know the future holds - that God has someone planned for me, and that right now you are somewhere, doing something, and that one day I'll get to meet you! I will be patient and will not allow myself to give my heart away to anyone else.

Love always,
Molly Rebecca

Thoughts on School Security (Bobcat 1!), school cops, teachers and their handwriting, studying, media intake, finals, cake, and celebration coming later...

OH...and an epic post about the personalities of the different cafeteria options as well!

In High School, I've learned there is no cure for a syndrome I like to call Vending Machine Paranoia. It attacks quickly, and will linger with you... possibly, for the rest of your life.

So, there was this one time my freshman year when I really wanted Goldfish at lunchtime, which is pretty much a daily occurrence. So I gathered 60 cents and marched up to the v-machine. I guess I was just excited about getting the G-Fish, because I only flippantly glanced at the number. This bit me in the face...because as soon as I punched in the number, I realized that I had punched in the wrong number, as I watched a stupid 100 Calorie pack of Oreo's fall down.

I hate Oreo's.

And if you've heard any of my rants crusading against anything that claims to be a "100 calorie pack" or "diet" anything, you can just imagine how angry I was.

I have never fully recovered from that day. The vending machine paranoia kicked in immediately. To this day I double - nay, Triple! - check the number before I punch it in.


Do you have it?

I am, by nature, fast-paced. I talk fast, write fast, eat fast, type fast...and I walk fast. Sometimes this makes for clash between me and slow walkers when walking on a path. I love you mother dear, but it's almost impossible to stand having to walk with you because I am constantly having to try to motivate you to speed up or stop and wait for you to catch up. But this is beside the point.

My point is, that this is just everyday life. And I know that not everyone is bothered by slower paced people in general like I am, which is fine.

But let's just face it - at school, NO ONE likes slow walkers in the hall. It's frustrating, it's hard to get around, and makes for awkward shuffle steps and lots of strategizing having to be done.

But then again, I think that it's only bothersome when you are walking by yourself. You don't notice it as much whenever you are walking with someone else. So I'm pretty sure there's a science to this (Not that I've done research, but it's a rough estimation based on empirical data) that every time you add a person to a cluster of people walking, it makes the cluster 20% slower. I mean, the slowest groups, of course, are the largest ones, which makes it like 80% harder for everyone else to try to get around them. It grows in obnoxiousness exponentially.

So, is there a solution to this? Wider halls, perhaps? Separate halls for people who want to just walk quickly by themselves? I guess this problem will not be solved during my time at Cy-Fair, and possibly never. In fact, I think this will follow me everywhere I go. I guess will forever have to endure slow walkers.

Just an observation.

This one is a simple one - I've learned that the simple act of showing teachers that you actually care about the class and want to do well makes all the difference. In my experience I've tried my best to make an effort to make sure the teacher knows who I am, and to make sure to talk to them and ask them questions and such. And it's helped me immensely. Exhibit A - Government last semester, I was on the brink of having a B (oh, the horrors!) - I talked to my teacher about my concerns about the final and how I was afraid that I might have a B and such, and Mr. Devries basically told me that he knows that I work really hard and have tried my best and have cared about the class this year, so even if I don't quite make the cut he'd help my grade up because I deserve it. BAM.

And I've heard that in college it's also really important to do this. Probably even moreso, because they have more students.

Thoughts?

1. I just painted my nails a sheer "Strawberry Sizzle" shade : )

2. I'm going to UMHB tomorrow to visit! I know I already said that, but I'm just excited.

3. I got my final paycheck from CFA today, and it was 116 bucks. BOOYAH. I didn't even think it would be 75.

4. I've really just been having a great week! Seriously...having a clean room makes ALL the difference.

5. I just love people. People joke about my "obsession" with Asians...but really, I just say that I have an Asian fetish because it's funny. Really, I'm fascinated by all different cultures. It's just so cool to me that everyone has a story, a history, traditions...

6. I really want to be fluent in French, right now. On that note, going to France would be pretty stinkin' cool too. I talked to my french friend Chloe the other day on Skype before school! It was tight. We talked about how cool it would be if I could go to France this summer and stay with her...cough cough...

7. On that note, I love French music! I have like 4 or so French cds...and it just amazes me everytime I listen to a French song how beautiful it sounds. How flowy and romantic...sigh! And they can talk so fast too. At first when I hear people who speak different languages talk fast (kind of like Nastia in Ukraine, for those of you who were there who are reading this!), and I'm like, how do people in their own language even understand? And then I remember how fast I can talk. It's just SO interesting how sounds take the form of thoughts and images and words and places and things. How, for instance, when we hear anything even resembling the sound "tree" we think of that large plant that grows out of the ground and has lots of leaves. It's just tight. My goal is to one day not have to even think about it...like, when I hear French to not have to translate it into English in my head. And to dream in French. How cool would THAT be?

8. I finished Till We Have Faces today. A great great book! I recommend it to everyone. I get to do a research paper on it, too! I'm excited : ), especially since I'll have my good ol' bro to help me out!

9. As much as some people have prejudices against it, which I know many cynics like Andrew and Jeremy do (not that there's anything wrong with that), PALs really has been so good for me this year. I've found some awesome, genuine people in there, and have really gotten to know so many people at my school through it. It also doesn't hurt that one of the guys in my PALs class pretty much looks exactly like what I think my future husband will look like (I mean, this boy is all kinds of dreamy, in a manly way of course, if that's possible). Of course, he has a girlfriend. "Ashlee". Psh! : P

10. So, Sadie Hawkins Dance got cancelled? Oh well. Takes the pressure off. And now I can fully focus all my attention and stress on Prom! Perf. A message to anyone (even though no one from my school reads this except for Taylor) considering asking me (since I know there are so many of you)...I'll be SO low-maintenance, you won't even notice that I'm there! I mean, all you'll have to do is pay for me. And for you. And pitch in for the limo. And you may have to rent a tux, just to look presentable. And there's this whole after-prom thing that everyone goes to. But, in the end, none of that really matters - Come on! I just wanna dance! Be a man.
:)

So, I just wanted to drop a line real quickly to update a little...

I started my new job Tuesday and Wednesday! I really like it. It's pretty chill. Mrs. Tammy is really nice, and the stuff I'm doing is actually interesting. It would help if I knew anything at all about the human body and medical terms, but since I don't it's kind of just a learning experience. So far I've been entering data concerning patients' surgeries which different Medical Assistants have assisted with so we can print and bill all the information to prove that the doctor needed this Assistant (whom Mrs. Tammy does the billing for - she has about 5 or 6 people she does this for, including her husband, and the reason she does this is so she can get either the insurance company or the patient to pay them) for the safety of the patient. It requires some inferring on my part concerning the diagnosis codes, knowing which ones to put that match up with what the doctor diagnosed them with, and lots of precision, as if a mistake is made the insurance company will send it back. So it's kind of exciting, and neat to see all these cases. A lot of the cases have to do with morbidly obese patients who get what is called, for short, a "Lap Chole" done to them, or a band around their stomach to help them eat less done through their bellybutton. I've also had to go onto the hospital's medical database online to see the exact Operation Report and their Facesheets and stuff to look for the codes and write down the times and look at their insurance cards to see what kind of insurance policy they have. I'm learning! It's intense. In any case, I'm enjoying it. I got paid yesterday since I won't be here on Friday...and it feels so good to have some money! Woop woop!

AND...tomorrow I'm going to UMHB with my Fam - (Bethany and Andrew) + Jeremy! It's going to be fun. I'm going to try my best to not go in with any expectations or biases....I'll give my full report after I get back!

A few simple, lovely things I've noticed I really love lately...

1. Cracks and bumps in old sidewalks where the roots of huge trees have burst through.

2. The last stretch of a long-distance run when my legs are burning and hurting but they mechanically, almost impulsively burst into a straight sprint as if I'm about to take flight. It's almost like I forget about the pain when I see the finish line. It's when I feel I'm about to die at the end of a long, hard run that I feel the most alive; rarely am I more aware of my blood pumping and driving steadily through my veins or the sound of my own breath than in those moments.

3. The subtle transition from winter to spring (and eventually to summer) in February/March, especially in Houston. It's usually just a wink of spring this early, but it's there. I just love it. The slowly rising temperature gets me so excited; just thinking about the sun and the warmer weather and the clear blue skies gives me so much joy :). Being able to go outside without a jacket...GLORIOUS! And what is even better than this current pre-transition, if you will, is the REAL transition in April. April 12 - MARK MY WORDS - is the climax, the day when you can tell that summer is coming the most. It's been that way several years in a row...I've written it in my journals each year : )

4. Nail polish. I just walked around in CVS in a while (it's one of my many forms of catharsis) and happened upon the most beautiful electric blue nail polish. I have always wanted blue nail polish, but was always a little afraid. But I just bought it, and it was beautiful. My toenails have never looked so bold! In any case, for some reason I just love painting my toes.

5. When there's an attractive boy that works at a certain place I see everytime I go in. It's fun to just admire from a distance, imagining qualities to bestow onto them in my mind. An example of this is the cute boy who works at CVS (enter Kristen Chenoweth's "There's a boy who works at Starbucks, who is very inspriational, who is very inspirational, because of many things...") who is pretty much always there. He's the one with which I had a little MCC bit with I posted on a month or so ago. In any case, it's fun to just observe, even though I know that I'm sure whoever I'm "admiring" would probably be a jerk or so not my type if I ever got to know them, therefore losing all appeal. My point is that it's fun to dream. But maybe that's just me.

6. I know I talk about Summertime a lot, and in this post already once before, but I will once more because this is my blog. I was just thinking about this whenever I was running today, how sometimes I feel almost as if Summer takes place just for me. Obviously, that's not true. But sometimes I enjoy the Sunshine and the summer atmosphere so intensely that I feel that it's shining just to make me happy; I think, Who else could possibly appreciate it more than I do? I like to think that that's how I'll feel with my future husband; that at times I will feel as if there's no possible reason he could have been created than for him to be in my presence and I in his. It's really hard to explain this feeling, and it probably sounds really silly. But I really enjoy squeezing as much pleasure I can out of things, or experiences, instances, people, places, words, sounds, smells. I just basically enjoy feeling deeply.

7. My penguin collection.

8. Being able to call my dad after school while he's at work to just vent about what is on my mind, and have him listen to me sincerely and let me just get it all out, no matter how jumbled my words may be or how fast I may talk.

9. When a great song is played on repeat in my head all day.

10. A clean room and a made bed. The best feeling in the world. I cleaned my room and washed my sheets and made my bed Saturday night...Sunday morning was one of the best I've had in a long time. I felt so well-rested and so cleared of stress, and as if a huge burden had been lifted. So lovely.

Oh, and me and my Kindergarten sweetheart are now Facebook friends. For those of you who are not aware of who this person it, he is Stephen Slavens, who I kissed on the cheek in Kindergarten on his birthday, in front of everyone, including his mom. That memory is one of the earliest memories I have. I said, "Happy Birthday Stephen", and then kissed him on the cheek, unashamedly, after having to get to the very tips of my toes, because he was the tallest and lankiest person in our class. He, of course, never showed any interest in me whatsoever. He was pretty awkward, and judging by his Facebook profile he's still as awkward (and tall) as he was back then. I guess that's what attracted me to him. I actually don't ever remember him speaking to me. I didn't care, though - I was in love with him! I have vivid memories of reading my diary to my family in my living room - "His eyes are like rainbows...". Some of my finest poetry. To this day my family still mocks me about it. In any case, I don't think anything will come of this Facebook friendship. But we'll see. Maybe an old flame of love will rekindle...

You'd be surprised at how non-awk I was back in the day...

I changed my mind. I'm going to do a mini-post. But I'm not going to repeat anything that I said in the last deleted post.

More than anything, I want to mend relationships before I go off to college. I mean, I'm really blessed with awesome friends, and so it's not like I have friendships that are in dire need of fixing, but there are just too many friendships in my life that are slipping. And I'm not afraid to say this in an open forum because if you are a close friend of mine and you are reading this, you are most likely on this list. It's not a bad thing, and it's mostly my fault. I get too complacent about friendships. And the easy thing to do would be to just let it sit there and fade out whenever I leave. But that is NOT what I want to do. So I'll figure something out. I just don't want everything to change. But things have been. God has blessed me with some new friendships this year...but I have friendships I've had since I was in elementary school, or like 6th grade. We've had so many great times together, and I'm so comfortable around them. I don't want to see my friendships change this much because of external circumstances. Pffft. Growing up is sometimes so not fun. Sometimes wish I could be stuck in time in the summer after my 8th grade year. Emerge, and the blossoming of our "group" after. Winning KOTB for the second time. Chaos Refined. That stupid chatroom we kept going for 2 weeks. Just being a 14 year old. I just sickeningly nostalgic just thinking about it.

My school is having a Sadie Hawkins Dance in March! I'm really excited. I'm pretty sure we have the same theme as Cy-Creek's. I asked our Senior Class President about it and she was like, what? haha. So maybe it was coincidence. In any case, it's called "Will You Glow With Me?" and it's going to be Glow in the Dark. I am SO stoked, because it's like, fun and casual. Of course, going means that I'll have to ask someone, which in my opinion is the silliest thing around. Sigh. You know how much stress this kind of stuff causes me. Whatevs. It is my senior year. I mean, Bree and Huds keep trying to get me and Matt to go to a dance together (us 4 sit at lunch together, so I guess it makes sense. Bree and Huds are dating, and so they kind of just want me and Matt to be together so it's complete. And they love to talk about it right in front of us. Good thing Matt is even more awk than I am), but Matt has made it so very clear that he doesn't ever want to go to a dance. We tried bribing him to go to Homecoming, but it didn't work. And he is under no circumstances going to prom. So I'm assuming that it would be a no to a silly Sadie Hawkins Dance. Plus, it would be more awk than I could handle. Anyways, case and point, all my guy friends at school are either taken or awk. Today I considered for like 2.2 seconds asking a more popular guy who I only sort of know/am associated with (no one in particular, just someone who would fit that profile) to see what they would say. And then I remembered how awk I am and decided that would be the worst idea in the world. Man, I love being me.

Speaking of, no Prom updates as of now. If I come up with a plan, the blogosphere will be the first to know!

Me and the fam are visiting UMHB next Friday. I really hope that I like it. I mean, I just want to fall in love with a school. I'm not one for settling.

Tomorrow is my last day at Chick-fil-A...!

Valentine's Day is coming up! It's on a Saturday this year. I have mixed feelings about that - I mean, the fact that it's not on a school day is not going to stop anyone from being extremely obnoxious at school the Friday before, which will make it even more obnoxious and grating because everyone will be celebrating it a day early, confirming the fact that people "celebrate" it just to show off. Oh, but I just remembered- I won't be here that day! I'll be at UMHB. So nevermind. Either way, I'm not going to succumb to complaining about VD. I'm down with VD. I think it's a great concept, showing someone you love that you love them. Even though I am happily "sig other"-less, VD for me is spesh because I celebrate it with the fam. Daddy always gets me and Bethie a little something : ) I'm excited to see what that may be this year! With that said, I'm still kind of happy VD is on a Saturday. Seeing high schoolers so obsessed with eachother (or obsessed with feeling like someone else is obsessed with them) is sickening. I won't lie about that. I'm just like...um, you aren't married! But this is a different subject for a different post. Me and HS dating are in a fight right now. So don't ask me what I think about it for a few months, when I'm out of high school and have a more logical perspective on it : P.

I'm just going to get you really excited...next week I'm going to devote sometime to completely bombarding you with some "What I've Learned in High School" posts! It's going to be good : ). I will have posts on many subjects, including Cafeteria line vs. Snack Bar/Cart, slow walkers, and even maybe some serious stuff, to give you a sneak-peak.

Now, I'm off to bed. Au revior....

I just wrote a long post. And then it got erased somehow.

I despise when this happens. I really do. And it happens to me a lot.

Sorry...I'm going to have to update on my life some other time. Right now I've not the motivation.

Okay, I'm starting this Live Blog a little late - like 5 minutes into the show.

All I have to say about what I didn't technically "live" blog about before the first commercial break is this - Creepy. Gangster Sun. Not digging it.

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Charlotte is like, bleeding everywhere! Ah!

Juliet just told Sawyer to go away. Get it, girl.

So it's the flashes that throw her clock off, and causes Charlotte to bleed. Juliet states the obvious. Danny doesn't know why it isn't happening to the rest of us.

Who is this guy Kate is with? Lawyer maybe? Oooh...it's the guy who asked her for her son's blood. She's offering a deal. She wants to talk to the client before she gives the blood. He'll pass along the offer. But of course the answer will be no. Because she's in "no position" to make any deals? Who is this client? Widmore? Exchange of custody? What?! She did this to herself? Bologna! She's GOING to lose the boy?!?!? Creeper.

I always forget what each Dharma place is called. Where's the Orchid? Oh, the greenhouse. Thanks Sawyer. He's going to bring them back...how? How will going to the Orchid make them come back? Ooooh...this is where the killing part comes in. Locke kills himself to get them to come back.

CS Lewis is awake! Looking at Danny in a weird way...she doesn't know who he is? Um it's the guy who loves you. Okay she's good. Daniel is so loving! It's adorable. Miles is a jerk and interjects at the most inconvenient times. ("Hooray, everything's good. Now what are we going to do".)

Sayid with Jack. Ben is on our side? LIAR. Sayid knows what's up. "The only side Ben's on is his own". Oooo, Jack's in trouble. And he's blowing the chick off. Hurley is calling. He's wearing orange. I'm assuming in jail. Ben, looking creepy as ever, waltzes in. Okay, so now there's this random black guy who comes in...injecting him with something?! GUN! SAYID IS SO STEALTHY!!! HE KNOWS! AHgadhf;lasdf;lasdhlfasld! Look at him go! What a beast. Who is this guy? Choking him with a wire. Hahaa, those tranks look funny. They are HUGE! They look like little flowers, or little mops. Oooh an address. Very astute, Sayid. Kate's address. So it's all connected...

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Jack calls Kate. Will she pick up? Yes. Jack must see Kate. She's downtown. Ben is "dealing with Hugo"? Whatever that means. Good luck with that, Benny. 72 hours, son!

(I always wonder how people can just memorize addresses/cross-streets to meet at like that on tv shows. It's like, "21223 Marble Court!" and the people just know automatically where to go. Weird. I'm like, wait, let me get a pen, and then I have to look it up on Google Maps. It's the best - true dat, double true!)

Haha. "Do you know when we are?" That will never get old. Now we are with CS Lewis and Danny and Locke and the gang. Miles is "peachy". You know, a non-sarcastic answer every once in a while wouldn't hurt.

Some screams from afar - Sounds like Claire! Her shrieks remind me of "MY BAABYYY!" She's talking to Kate. Oh my gosh. Sawyer sees her face! Weird! Wow. This is giving me chills. Look at Sawyer's face! Oh no, the white light! Brace yourself, Charlotte. And now Kate is gone. : (

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Jack gets out of his curiously ugly and out-of-date car to meet Kate. When Kate says "You shaved your beard", I'm pretty sure she means that he finally doesn't look like he's a druggie alcoholic who never bathes anymore. And she's right. He did clean up.

Somebody wants Aaron. "Get in or don't". I'm going to start using that line. Dad thinks that Ben is doing this to get Kate to want to leave. Hmm...

Now we're back on the island. Locke is very emotionally invested in finding out what Sawyer saw, apparently. He's grilling him about it. Obnoxious. Locke "needed the pain" to get to where he is now. Interesting.

Oh no, now Miles has a nosebleed. Something's happening. Duration of exposure? How long does Danny think they've been on the island for? Not sure what his "Are you sure about that?" comment means...

Now they are at their camp. Weird. Everyone's gone. Creepy long rowboat things. Charlotte asks where they came from. "Good question", Danny says. They decide to take the boats. But where would they go? What would they do with them? What if they have a time flash thing in the middle of the sea? Now that would be interesting! Sawyer admits he saw Kate to Juliet. Why to her and not to Locke? Oh my gosh, someone is shooting. PADDLE! "I think they want their boat back!" heh. VERY scary. NOW would be a great time to have a time thingie. Oh my gosh scary! Intense. Time flash! Yay! Sawyer is thinking the same thing I am - "THANK YOU LORD!" And now they are in a storm. Hahaa. "I TAKE THAT BACK!"

Jack's trying to convince Kate to trust him and to let him help her. They see Claire's mother. I'm assuming she's the one who wants Aaron.

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Now it's raining, and Jack and Kate are still in the car. Kate wants to put the car in Drive, and Jack wants her to keep it in Park. Jack claims he can fix it. Seems to be his motto. Now he goes to Claire's mom's room. This should be interesting...

I love Australian accents! : ) He admits to following her lawyer. Wrong move. He's being really forward. Eeek. "Who's Aaron"? What? "What are you doing here in LA?" Looking creepy. She doesn't know anything? Weird! She sued Oceanic. Coincidence...I think not! But maybe. Who's trying to take Aaron?!

Pan to Ben. Ben and Sayid...not a good combo. Man, I loved that time that Sayid tortured Ben, when he was still Henry Gale. But whatevs. UGH! Now Ben is with this guy who keeps popping up, the lawyer. Maybe he IS behind all this Aaron nonsense. He's Ben's lawyer.

Now back on the island, and it's pitch dark. Will they ever sleep?

Juliet and Sawyer are going to finish their conversation. Love music comes on. He wishes he could have touched Kate or talked to her. But of course he couldn't. OH NO!! Juliet is bleeding now. It's taking over!

Charlotte sees Wreckage. French! It's Rousseau's group! Yay! This is exciting. They see a creepy dead person in the middle of the water. Who is it? JIN!!! How in the world?! Say what? How could he have been there with Rousseau's group? Whatev. I'm just glad that I get to see him. I've missed Jin!

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Jack is showing Kate the note that had her address on it. We need to get Kate and Aaron someplace safe, he says. Now he's out of the car. Ben is here. Dun dun dunnn! Kate seems betrayed to find that Ben is "with" Jack, whatever that means. Kate is right. Ben is the one who is trying to take Aaron. Ben unashamedly admits it. "I'm sorry", he says. How trite. Gangster Sun with the jet black straight hair and all black clothes gets out of the car.

JIN IS ALIVE!! Maybe this isn't Rousseau's group. Jin speaks a little English. "Boat. Sink." It MUST be Rousseau, 'cause she's preggers. I just want to know how he survived. She's Danielle Rousseau. And he KNOWS! He must be pretty stinking confused because he doesn't know about the time stuff.

LOST.

"Bad Wobot..."

Pretty stinking good episode. 

Mom and dad just made some rockin' fried rice, so I felt inspired to see how long I could make a list of things I love that start with the letter R...

1. Rice, in any form
2. Roberts family
3. Roadtrips
4. the Russian language
5. Reading
6. Rhyme
7. Rhythm
8. Rock n' Roll (I admit this one is a tad cheesy)
9. Real people (as in, genuine)
10. Roofs
11. Rabbits
12. Running
13. Rowboats
14. Roses
15. my Room
16. Rome
17. Raspberry Punch Mrs. Angie makes


Okay. I'm out. This was a lot harder than I thought it would be.

Today's been a good day! : ) I quit Chick-fil-A officially. I'm still technically working there until Feb 17th because I had to give a two-weeks notice, but ya know. Woohoo! It was actually sad, though. They were heartbroken! But they thankfully understood. 

So, basically, I just got another job!

Totally random, too. God provides in the strangest ways.

Mrs. Tammy Sweet, Mr. Shawn Meyers' sister, left me a message during school saying that she was offering me a part-time job helping her out with her husband's business, which I still don't know what it is called or exactly what they do. All I know is that my job will entail calling insurance companies and helping her print medical records and making appeals to the insurance companies, etc. Sounds more up my alley! I'm really super excited. I was a little hesitant to accept at first, because it would require commitment, and any change is difficult for me...but I think that this is good. I prayed about it (I know that it's only been a day, so I'm not going to lie and say that I've been like fasting over this decision. But I did pray about it on my ride home from  Mrs. Kristi's, and got the blessing from my parents. I just feel really good about it, which I think is a good sign), and of course I made an epic pro-con list. Me and the fam just went to El Gallo to talk it out, and we came to a decision that I should take this job and quit Chick-fil-A! The timing couldn't be any better, too. I have paid off the debt, so my motivation for working at Chick-fil-A is very slim, and I've really been not enjoying CfA lately anyway. I would even venture to say that it's been miserable. AND...this new job is 10$/hour with no money taken out for taxes! And I have evenings with my family now because I would work from 2-6 three days a week. It will take a little bit of getting used to initially, but I think that I will like this. Even if I don't particularly enjoy it tons, the paycheck will so be worth it. At Chick-fil-A I haven't been able to work as many hours because I work nights there and I have lots of church stuff during the night-time, so the benefit of staying at CfA is almost non-existent, especially considering that what I will make a week at this new job is equivalent to basically what I would make in two in a half weeks at CfA.

I feel really good about this! I've already switched mentally over to this new job, and am so ready to commit. I'm ALL IN. I can't wait to see what God has in store for me there!

I'll keep you updated on how this progresses...