Honestly, I'm just so ready to see Him move, to witness something amazing. To see prayers I've been praying for over a year answered. Not the minimum, but to witness in ABUNDANCE what He can do. I feel like it's been so long since I've seen that. Not that it's been long since I've seen Him move in my life or since He's answered prayers for me - I've seen a lot of that this semester! It's been wonderful, and I pray that He would continue. But as I was driving home from eating with my LP friends, it weighed extremely heavy on me. You know, when you want so badly to see something happen, that you almost even wish that you could forfeit your own personal experiences with Christ to see someone else experience His presence and be changed forever? I mean, I'd give anything to see certain situations turned around. To witness complete redemption in someone else's life. I mean, what does it take? More prayer and pleading? Lives are hanging in the balance. It will take a miracle! I'm only one person, though, and a very imperfect one at that. I refuse to accept that this is the way it simply has to be. I mean, if you step back and think about it, if Christ really rose from the dead (which, He did), then it matters. All my interactions with people hold eternal weight. Yet, I can't quite hammer that into my brain. My heart is not burdened enough, my conversations aren't enough sprinkled with salt, my faith is certainly not strong enough. Do I really believe that He changes lives? I've seen it in mine. But it's honestly been so long since I've seen salvation in the life of someone I had personally prayed for. When I read about people coming to know Christ and God working miracles, it's now almost becoming some sort of mythical, far-off idea - "that's so great that that happened to them, but I'll never see that", or "I wish God did that for the people in my life". I know that I'm not bold enough, full of enough faith, or passionate enough; but why do I feel like it depends on me? It's obviously in God's hands, but that doesn't mean that I can just sit around waiting for Him to do something! It's such an odd balance to find. There are SO many things that I long to see happen. Why WOULDN'T He want to save these people, change this ministry, reach that people group, show Himself to this person, demonstrate His power for His glory alone?

Oh, Father, continue to weigh this heavy on me, so much that it brings me to my knees more each day. Give me wisdom and perseverance in prayer, and through it all, give me more of Jesus. But, God... please move.